Meet always-teary-eyed Nandini.
The only mother whose mamta can give serious competition to Mamta’s mamta.
Nandini has two sons.
Rahul, the older, is adopted.
They found him in Kuch Kuch Hota Hai and decided to adopt him, along with half the cast of that movie.
And Rohan, the younger, is pretty much unwanted, but he doesn’t care.
Nandini’s husband, meanwhile, is Yashwardhan Raichand, who is also married to parampara.
The Raichands are a rich, happy, sanskari family because as Babuji once said, “the family that prays together stays together.”
But things go drastically wrong when the Raichands realize a couple of things have changed since Rahul’s Kuch Kuch Hota Hai Days.
The first, thankfully, is his dressing sense.
The second is his taste.
Rahul fell in love with Anjali when he saw her doing what all girls do all the time in Chandni Chowk, or in Karan Johar’s Chandni Chowk anyway, Bhangra.
His father, however, refuses to accept Anjali, claiming she will never be able to understand their parampara.
Sidenote: Parampara is the Rebecca of this movie – she is always referred to, she constantly messes up everyone’s lives, but you never actually see her.
But Rahul marries Anjali anyway, leaving them with no choice but to run away
They run all the way to London, taking with them Anjali’s little sister Pooja and Rahul’s mother from his Kuch Kuch Hota Hai days, who also happen to be Rohan’s best friend and his Nanny respectively.
Because, as mentioned, no one really cares about Rohan.
This isolation makes Rohan sad and he drowns his sorrows in kilos, losing a tremendous amount of weight and turning into this
When he finishes college, Rohan sets off to find his brother and bring him back.
So he takes a flight to London, with a stopover at patriotism.
Remember how once upon a time the British ruled over India? Well Karan Johar avenges all those years of suppression in just one song.
First, the Indian Flag is all over London, everywhere, literally.
Second, street dance is Bharatnatyam.
Third, they took our freedom, we take their ice cream,
And their soother.
Once he’s done with vengeance, Rohan gets in touch with Pooja, played by Kareena Kapoor on a Yaadein hangover
Dancing in bed-check
Longest beauty regime in the world-check
Totally worth the effort- check
Rohan and Pooja exchange sad stories
And then Rohan enters his brother’s house as a sushil and sanskari paying guest
He then keeps poking his flaring nostrils into the family’s business until Anjali and his ex nanny figure out who he is
Rohan then decides it’s time to put the cherry on his tricoloured cake of patriotism as well
So he makes a whole class of British children sing the Indian national anthem
And the national anthem unites the two brothers (Awwww).
Rahul finds out who his paying guest really is, leading to this
And then this
And once enough tears have been shed to solve all of India’s drought problems, this
Because really Rohan, no one wants you.